part FOUR

Let's just keep the past here.

2009-02-28T02:11:00.000+08:00

As above(:

Soundtrack To Your Life

2009-02-27T12:34:00.002+08:00

Ashley Parker Angel

If you can hear me
And know that im right here
I heard your heartbeat
It took away the fear
Cuz my life is sliding
I tried to ride the wave
It came down crashing, it's time to start again
Backwards to go forward
Left at every corner
Been there and back again
And when the music ends

Your life is a flashback
A question, a photograph
A statement, a story, a struggle
A chance to laugh
Cuz if you don't laugh you cry
A last crescendo when you die
So hit the rewind and listen
It's the playback
The soundtrack to your life

First step, your last breath
Everythings been planned
There's questions, and answers
You'll never understand
I hold on, but let go
I give you room to breath
Remember, the best things
Were never mine to keep
Starting at the ending
It won't break, while your bending
Been there, and back again
And when the music ends

Your life is a flashback
A question, a photograph
A statement, a story, a struggle
A chance to laugh
Cuz if you don't laugh you cry
A last crescendo when you die
So hit the rewind and listen
It's the playback
The soundtrack to your life

The soundtrack to your life
And it goes by like a bullet, and my name
It may be different than yours but, you got the same
Beat a broken back for more
I'll be dragging my own ass off the floor
I've thrown my self right in and,
whats the point if you don't live in

If you can hear me
And know that im right here
I heard your heartbeat
It took away the fear

Your life is a flashback
A question, a photograph
A statement, a story, a struggle
A chance to laugh
Cuz if you don't laugh you cry
A last crescendo when you die
So hit the rewind and listen
It's the playback
The soundtrack to your life

Let you go,

2009-02-27T12:11:00.006+08:00

Ashley Parker Angel

Broken promises
But you don't really mind
It's not the first time
And you know it, don't you know
Tell me why it is you only smile inside
But when you break me into nothing

Don't you know
It's not like I haven't tried
Over and over again
Stupid fights
Wrong or right
Goodbye...

I Remember when you came with me that night
We said forever, that you would never let me go
But here I am again
With nothing left inside
No I don't wanna but I gotta let you go

You're the one mistake
I really didn't mind
So beautiful, unmerciful
It took me down
Too little and too late
So now I know your kind
You fake it easy, just to please me
Don't you know

It's not like we haven't tried
Over and over again
Sleepless nights wrong or right
Goodbye...

I Remember when you came with me that night
We said forever, that you would never let me go
But here I am again
With nothing left inside
No I don't wanna but I gotta let you go

I gotta let u go...
It's you...
Theres nothing I can do
I remember when you came with me that night
You said forever, you said forever, you said forever

Here I am again
With nothing left inside
No I don't wanna but I gotta
Let You Go

Love, save the empty

2009-02-27T12:05:00.006+08:00

Love, save the empty ,Erin McCarley

Little girls don't know how to be sweet girls.

Mama didn't teach me.

Little boys don't know how to treat little girls.

Daddy didn't show me.

Face down, on top of your bed.

Oh why did I give it up to you?

Is this how I shoot myself up high,

Just high enough to get through?

Again, the false affection.

Again, we break down inside.

Love save the empty.

Love save the empty, and save me.

Sad boy, you stare up at the sky

When no one's looking back at you.

You wear your every last disguise;

You're flying, then you fall through.

Again, the false attention.

Again, you're breaking inside.

Love save the empty.

Love save the empty, save me.

Love save the empty.

Stars feel like knives,

They tell us why we're fighting.

Storm, wait outside.

Oh, love, hold us together.

Love, save the empty.

Love, save the empty, and save me.

And save me.

Birthday dedications^^

2009-02-25T19:22:00.005+08:00

One upon a rainbow lay God's promise to not destroy humanity.

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY, GRACE!(18th Feb)
You've been the best tuition partner I ever had! :D Luvs!

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY, DAMIAN!(19th Feb)
It's been really great to have known you! :D HOHO!

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY, YUANFANG!(23rd Feb)
I think you would have thought I had forgotten your birthday! But actually, I just totally forgot to message you! ): Hope you forgive me AND STAY HAPPY THAT WAY. Any problem I'll be here(:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY,

SHAUNNY/DONGQIANG/JIHONG/SHAUN! :DDD
As we always say, can have legal sex already! :D Luv you as always & will never take you for granted ever again! ^^v

HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY,
PUTRI AH JIE! :DDDD
No matter how frequent or rarely we meet(well, once a year sadly) I'LL NEVER EVER FORGET HOW MUCH YOU'VE PULLED ME OUT OF MUD IN THE PAST! :DDDD LOVESSSSS!

IN THAT INSTANT,

2009-02-24T21:20:00.003+08:00

my sister lost her hymen membrane. *feels like extending a punch*

FYI, Women who have lost their hymen membrane are usually non-virgins. So.....

yeaaaaaaah. Get your own conclusion. ):

My poor lil sister's **

2009-02-24T21:03:00.004+08:00

My sister was balancing along this really narrow piece of wood when she lost it & hit her ** against the surface. HELL, OUCCCCH.

I bet my blog is boring everyone - EVEN ME without pictures. Its been about a month since I un-lazied myself & put up some pictures. OH WELLLL!

"So how do you think you would fare for English?"
Got killed.
"Biology?"
More or less screwed.
"How about Amaths? Isn't math your strongest subject?"
A total screw up. ZZZZZZZZ
"Well, looks like your allegable for death! Sign up over there*points down*"

HALLELUJAH.
BETTER TRAIN UP BEFORE OLYMPIC DAY.
As Mr Chan(or whoever he heard this from) says
"Do not worry about things that you cannot control, for if you could control them, you would not worry"
Or some psycho thing like that.
Alamak, study already results come out worse than when I dont revise! *curses in Balapapan language*

JOSS STICKS!

2009-02-23T22:39:00.003+08:00

OMG I UNCOVERED A SUPER COOL WEBSITE FOR THOSE WHO THINK MATH IS BORING. :DDD

Jφss Sticks
For effective prevention of Last-Minute Buddha Foot Hugging Syndrome
-or at least, that's what they claim. :D

She's ultra retarded. HAHAHAHA.

DRRRAB & DISGOOSTEENG, saturday

2009-02-23T19:19:00.003+08:00

PINK PANTHER TWO WAS FAWESOME! :DDDD

Especially when your out with a whole clan wearing black walking in a straight line along Newton Circus. :D And of course going out with a bunch of fun-loving & caring friends you have caught up with in some time! (:

Oh well, got to go & get facts right for Physics, Amaths & whatever that test is on Wednesday. :B Toodiewoos!

/DONT GET ALL EMOTIONAL, PLEASE VNS! "L" Loser loser loser. :DD

Looking forward

2009-02-22T01:44:00.002+08:00

Spoke to DQ over how he handled similiar situations. :B We're aiming for the same spots, looking forward to the same education. He seemed happier than me :D I guess studying together every other Saturday might help. I'm feeling better than a few days ago. I REALLY REALLY WANT TO THANK Kelly, GW, Gary, Syahida, & ChinTeck because I think Im a total nuisance because Im always getting REALLY REALLY LOW & then normal again then SUPER DUPER ULTRA LOW then normal again. Alamak. *slaps face* SO SO SO, REALLY THANK YOU ALL FOR BEING SO SO WELL & PATIENT WITH ME!!!!!!! AND STICKING THROUGH WITH ME FOR SO LONG! :D LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!!!

Note to self:
Must.
Stop.
Feeling.
Like.
Shit!

As the pieces are getting back together & stars all aligned,

2009-02-19T19:58:00.004+08:00

Thank you so much for your encouragement. For telling me all the disasters and picking up I have to face when I dont get a degree. For showing me the amount of money you have to fork out when I get to NUS(if I ever get there my brain must have been fried 87 times before) & that all the doe would automatically fly down the drain if I dont make it there & back with a degree. That if I dont get to a JC, dont get a Alevel cert Im just hopeless & just a pest. That studying must be me. And I cannot have a life without that lifeless slip of paper.

Mum, thanks. Alot.

I'm only but one big fat failure.

2009-02-19T18:56:00.004+08:00

-Warning, this is a lengthy useless & lame(to you) rant post-
Never felt this way before but Im so fucking stressed up with every damn thing. Im annoyed/angry/pissed/disappointed/exhausted/frayed/feeling stupid/at a loss & having a headache at this current shit moment.

Can someone just tell me WHAT TO DO?!?! How I can solve my ALL my Physics questions? How I can decipher all the Chinese characters I have never seen in my damn life? What can I do to stop being so ADD & be more fucking focused to what I dont understand?! Explain to me what are all the friendship rules & regulations straight to my face so I can refrain myself from breaking them un-fucking-intentionally!!? What the hell is wrong with me?!

I screwed my Bio test, my Chem test, my Geog test & prolly my MT test. Why am I putting too much pressure onto myself this time?? So much so I can feel it crawling & forcing my head down?? Or is it because of all my relatives telling me that I have to do well so that my mum will live a better life, apart from all of this?????? And that my education is so important that it is more important than my damn hellshit life????????????

THAT I CAN JUST FUCKING JUMP OFF THE CLIFF & NO ONE WILL GIVE TWO HOOTS ABOUT THIS SOUL ONCE THERE ARE ALL As?!!!! & THAT I CAN KILL MYSELF ONCE I DONT??? & that these tears the stress is initiating & all the emotions Im going through are part & parcel of the service Im supposed to render to the family? And no other living human being would bother to save me & ask about how I feel?

I've totally lost my originality, creativity & the organ to express myself properly without a stutter. WHO ON EARTH AM I NOW?!?!?????

In the past, I'll be happy I passed. Now a just pass feels like a knife squeezed with lemon seared through the layers of fats & muscle of the heart. Even worse, the grinning of others who get better marks than me who spend less time studying. What happened to all the HAPPY-GO-LUCKYness of it all?

Conclusion: Am I really such a stupid person whom they say "study or never study also the same"?? Can someone help me? The minority who will read through all this shit & give me a hug & who will go through whatever it takes to make me feel at ease again?
-end of long rant post-

2009-02-19T18:43:00.001+08:00

Bimb. Oh fuck.

8, 9, 8, 9, 8, 9, 10!

2009-02-17T22:01:00.000+08:00

Smart, smart, smart.

BE SMART.

Ache from all the smiles

2009-02-16T19:41:00.003+08:00

First was leukemia for PSLE, then it was water in the lungs last year during Christmas, now cataracts for Olevels?!
Nicholas, your really killing me(ironic much)!

I really really adore you for your forever positivity. You can laugh, cheer me up & joke around when your in ginormous pain & are close to going blind! Man, I really love you for making the most impacts in my life though I haven't seen you for like 4 years! You know how weird that is?!

I really really really absolutely cant wait to watch you grow up & stop getting all ill with the weird diseases!!!! ):

Carry on with the smiles & take care!!!!!!! (:

I still feel like going abroad & learn new things. I'm like a total sponge, absorb really quickly. :D AND I WANT TO TRAVEL AROUND THE WORLD WITH SOMEONE I REALLY LOVE. Someone who's smart, caring & funny! ;D Oh hell.

Sophisticated, sophisticated, MAKE AN IMPACT!

MUNOFS

2009-02-16T18:09:00.003+08:00

I don't know what possesed me 'cos right now, I feel like packing my luggage to fly overseas to studyyyyyyyyyyyy! ):

I know it sounds really random but it's really boring in Singapore! I think it'll wear off soon. "3 I wanna join my cousinssssssssssss. T_T

SO ANYWAY, MUNOFS conference ended yesterday afternoon, so I wont meet them anymore. Awwwwww, pictures capture those really dumb moments though! :D

This is Julian, the really crazy guy who got us into trouble. :B

Go to FB for more, yes Im really this lazy. Yaaaaawn!

MUNOFS

2009-02-14T23:58:00.004+08:00

:DDDDD MUNOFS though is a little embarrasing for us, the students of Bendemeer Secondary(we went there underesatimating the situation & unprepared!!!!)it was really an eye-opener to us all. It made us realise the issues the people are facing & WE ARE COMPETING AGAINST THESE HIGHLY INTELLECTUALS IN O-LEVELS. Only makes me want to go "Oh shit, we're so deaaaaaad!"

Anyway, I made new friends! :D Amelia, Julian, YiDa, John, Sumiha, Zahra, Megan. So I got into some shit with Julian. HAWHAWHAW, THAT GUY'S A JOKER! :B Then he got all, "These fxcking bitches practically have no life that's why they come here & because they have no lives, they come here & try to ruin ours. Gosh, do we really need to come tomorrow?" I wanted to LOL, but rules are rules. T_T

Debates may seem very ordinary & plain to see, but when you bring it up on the podium, it brings everything else to a wholey different level. Im so so so glad & angry at the same time I attended such a conference. :D

Hell, I spent 3/4 of my time on Vee Day there. :B Met up with Kelly & Reynard for dinner. :D

Im doing my speech now for tomorrow. AMELIA PLEASE DONT BULLY ME! T_T

Secret rendezvous,

2009-02-09T21:51:00.001+08:00

pinkypromised.

FAQ

2009-02-09T21:30:00.005+08:00

I got tired repeatedly trying to answer the almost never-ending latest question,

"YOU CUT YOUR BANGS AH? WHY?!"

1)Yes, I cut my fringe straight/stuck to my forever-sticky forehead
2)B'cos I got bored with the same old hair everyday & needed a laugh at myself
Yah I know ugly, but at least I got guts to cut. Hehehehe & FYI(if you hadnt figured)
3)HAIR DOES GROW!!!

So get a life & cos I answered all your ridiculously undeterred questions :B

Petrified, clueless & half a step away from the coffin.

2009-02-09T19:21:00.005+08:00

It's a little tough to stand in between right & wrong. In the handbook, it states that by the time we graduate from primary school, we should be able to distinguish from right & wrong.

I would otherwise mention, there will never be a clear line from right and wrong in the human world. You see two people crying & shouting to each other, both strong in their own beliefs, not listening but trying to make a stand for themselves. The two are defending themselves, not admitting that at least a little part of
what they have done was their mistake. In the wrong. Your standing in between. Your torn between standing up for either party, then you suddenly realise, your only a 16 year old & you dont belong in that family. You just live there because they would start hollering at you for not going home. You sleep on that bed, in that room they provide you because they think your going out having sex with other teenagers. They are adults & your just(no matter how old) a child in their eyes. Whatever you say, mention or do is inaccurate, not in precision or should I say, their assumptions are that your plain stupid.

Now, in your stand, tell me who's wrong & who's right. Who's REALLY affected by all the drama & trauma caused by your, only true love you have, family.

Hard right. But of course, I found a way to deal with it. >:D A few calls, a bath & running outside to study seemed like a pretty effective way.
Since,
1)Its not my issue
2)Im enough of an adult(for them)
3)I dont belong there.

I really wish someone would stop being angry with me for some godforsaken reason, it hurts at my left ventricle. Hai.

On a lighter note, Im achieving better Bio grades than last year's. B) AND, IM CHATTING WITH DARYL ON MSN! :DDD WORKING AGAIN YAY! *peace sign)

Ahhhh, thanks AhFat I've a handmade Mr Gingerbread Man as an advanced Vday present. :D TOTAL LOVES!

/Everyone's tired so Ive a made a pact with myself that I shouldnt feel so bad to motivate everyone else to work harder! :D
Which spells;
No sleeping in class(no.1 killer for me!), no talking shet with my dear teletubbies & more encouragement to others who seem down at the moment! (:
For advanced Vday,

I LOVE YOU ALL &

HAVE A MERRY VALENTINE'S DAY! :D

50+ days down before

absolute hardwork & complete happiness. :DDDDDDD

The good, the bad, the horribly wrong.

2009-02-05T18:57:00.002+08:00

So I finally bothered to download live messenger! The bad side is, I cant use it(I guess the computer hates me that bad) so Im still using the old version which I haaaaaaaaaate! D:<
___
I miss AhFat irritating me till I get a headache. I miss AhFat probing about how well or how in the dumps my life is. I miss meeting AhFat near my house to study, do homework but 75% of the time fail to complete our tasks. I miss AhFat laughing at the stupidest things I say & I laughing at the weirdest things she does. :D Yet, rest assured, we will never fade away although we seldom meet or come online to chat often because I just know we wont! (: ♥

There just so many freaking weird things that are happening at the present second & Im just too weak & powerless to change all this. Shit!

Hehe, Im going to meet her now. :B

Anyhowz, Im loving the life Im living in class(even though I still think someone is mad at me! D: & I dont know why lah! DDDD:) Loves Gffs! XDDD

I can never fathom why your ghost

can never leave my room. D:<

I can predict my own future. :B

2009-02-01T22:37:00.002+08:00

Its 1stFeb! :D Big deal! Of course big deal! :D Drastic change! You know why! HAHAHAHA, I CUT MY FRINGE. HAHAHAHAHA, OMGWTFBBQ. Dont tell you what I cut. HEHEHE.

Anywayz, went to Jurong East's swimming complex with AnnRey!
(www.guesthenextline.blogspot.com)
Stop plotting your evil graphs! >:D

Saturday! Went to Vanessa's house to mess up! HOHOHO.
(www.th-absence.blogspot.com)
Got seriously MABOKKKKKKK.

Im a very lazy mammal. Lost the motivation, passion, FEEL, to blog. I just want a damn polariod to keep pictures safe in my diary. DDDDD: PICTURES SPEAK. :PpPpPp

Im a busy busy bumble bee! Bzzzzz! ;D

I know this will be the best period of my life. The rest, are just crap days.

Nightrice,

2009-01-31T01:10:00.003+08:00

♥
Shake it like a polaroid picture

Speaking of which, I WANT A FREAKING POLAROID!
I didnt get it for Christmasssss!*whines like a spoilt sweet sixteen girl on MTV*

Impossible is temporary:D

2009-01-30T23:47:00.006+08:00

STLOH, HAPPYCHINESENEWYEAR
HA
HA
HA
HAPPY 15th BIRTHDAY! :D You & your bestfriend game! Its spreading! O: Stay strong with your b! &&& maybe we get to watch Z100 soon! HAHAHA! :B

Ok, yes Homie, my blog title is because of the thing you put on your blog. HEEHEE.

I have 4 wishes to make this time I came to blog. I hope someone(me!) can make into reality. (:

1)Have a happy family.
Happy family not only means me being contented & happy('cos I always will be:D), I also want my mum to be fit & strong as a bull, with 10hours of sleep everyday. No quarrels over minute dumb redundant shit. No crying over stupid & hopeless acts.

2)Want my cousins to come back home.
And of course their parents so we can go out anytime & anywhere we want! Of course when Im in trouble they can help me, when they are in dipsheet, I can help them out too.

3)Forever friends.
I do believe I have my rockers with me, no matter how close we are in school or outside school, whether we talk everyday or dont talk at all, I believe I have my beloved peeps who care about me. (: And of course I love them too! I wish even after we graduate we'll still meet up & have a cup of coffee(okay, maybe not so posh XD)! Like DA BOTCH. :B

4)Be focused, & perform at my peak.
This, I have to take time to think about what I REALLY want. Yeah, and my NAPFA Gold. Chicken bun. ):

YAY! I think I have more but I guess I dont know how to put it. I also dont want to reveal so much about my life on the internet. :P I cant do it, roar.

I know that if Im contented(知足), Im happy. When Im happy, I positive thinking.
When Im positive thinking, I irritate others to be positive thinking with me.
:D

Growing stronger after all the attempts of trying to hurt me. :D

My 2nd day of Chinese New Year

2009-01-28T00:04:00.008+08:00

Okay! To start off, Im now going to admit, I have been playing mahjong recently. :B Because I couldnt resist the mahjong's aura & impossible temptation to touch the tiles. XD Played with GW, Elton, Vincent, Shaun, Kelly, Vanessa, Damian, ZhiEn, Clement, Joshua(cowz), Joel(cowz), Auntie LeeLee & Mama most of the time. HAWHAWHAW. Won some, lost some. ;D It's okayz.

Anyway, today GW, Elton & I set off for a journey (well Shaun couldnt go because his parents made him go out, sigh) to BAI NIAN. :D We had 2 objectives;

1)Take angpao(HOHOHOHO)

2)Take pictures that we visited their house(HEHEHE, my gain!)

First stop! ZhangSheng's(Junki) place!

Next, ShihNing's home! :P His Mum very generous leh, but I'm still gonna keep the amount a secret. :D

Halfway to Damian's place, we met me(Vanessa)! HAHAHA.

Last but not least, Clement's humble home for steamboat! Heeee! & duh, mahjong lah!

Most of us stayed till about 10 before we walked homehomehome. Hoho!

Honestly, this post has the most lah, leh, lors in my blog okay! :DDD I just feel very Singlapolee-on today. ;PpPp Tomorrow's PE & I wonder if I'd be fit enough to run. Sigh.

____

Ask about how was my first day of CNY? Ha, I'd love to forget. (: Let's just pray & hopez, things will get better or stay this way. I'm getting very exhausted being in this family. Im glad I chose to think of the positive end. May Stef & Gerald join us next year(thats what I wish for all the time). I'm just really happy that I'm moving forward everytime anyone tries to push me back. :D

Too little too not

2009-01-23T21:03:00.003+08:00

My stupid ears are blocked. D:

They are b'cos my nose is blocked. DD:

And they will constantly be b'cos I'll always have inadequate sleep. DDD:

I will forever be restless as long as my stepdad doesnt look after my siblings. DDDD:

I have rarely heard any elderly talk about the World War II. After I heard what they have did to other fellow Singaporeans, I feel absolute digust for the people in that generation who treated them that way. Death Railway, hanging humans in the sun for 3-4days till they were dehydrated, parched & dying and the water treatment. I could hardly contain my emotions as I felt this lump stuck in my throat. Luckily some others started talking crap afterward.

Should get off the computer. Sister's waiting for me.

(Mahjong craze today. ^^, Elton, Gw, Shaun, Vanessa, Damian, Zhi En.)

Over you.

It's no use pretending that we can fight it

2009-01-21T21:28:00.002+08:00

Sqrlz.

Haaaaaaaaar. If it is, it would've been our dream come true, if it isn't, I'd be damn glad(oh saddistic if it means).

Mamamiaaaaaaaa. It's 9.30pm & I realised I'm only left with a page for revision of Biology(because I love to reenact that Im a pro :B)

Never act with confidence unless one has excellence in one's profession.

Living day by day has never been so hard. I want achieve good grades, but I know its doesn't come without studies. I want to sleep, but I have too much revision I have to catch up on. I want to be a joker, but Im throwing my respect for others away. I want love, but it slips through my grasp.

When can I ever be the best person I can be? At least to fight for my case, Im not stuck in my comfort zone.

Maybe all I need is lie down for a full 8hour faint, it will seem better. Yes, maybe.

I loved the hug Stickman! :D

And so,

2009-01-17T23:56:00.004+08:00

LOVE

IS THE

MOVE

MENT

Addicted, addicted, addicted. I just cant stop. It feels, looks, gets better everytime. I dug out......, passion. (:

I just want to get better. :DDD

Been going out very often these days. Have to prevent that from happening. Even so, I would have brought my homework or something to work on in case I have a pinky of time to squeeze in. ^^ Hardworking eh? Ought to.

Even if people say I never changed, to me, I believe I have. Inside of me. In the past when I was all alone(like literally at home, alone), I would be sad, agitated, feeling helpless & unwanted. Now when Im alone, by myself, I would think about all the happy things & the world turns out to be a better place. Naturally.

I guess sleep helps. Ooooh, havent been online for some time so people are talking to me. Well, still I got to sleep. Hee. Pimple bombardment!!! DDD:

A little disappointed with the results. Sigh.

All I want to do,

live up today.

Japstyle.

2009-01-16T16:18:00.002+08:00

ICHI NI SA SHI GO ROKU SHICHI HACHI KU JU.

WATASHI WA YAO MAKAN ICHIGO AISUKURIMUUU. :DD

Sigh, Im beat.

Stephanie!

2009-01-13T12:22:00.004+08:00

STEPHANIE LEE SZE LIANG!

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
WHY DID YOU HAVE TO LEAVE BEFORE YOUR BIRTHDAY?! WALAO EH! THEN MAYBE AFTER YOU CELEBRATE WITH YOUR FRIENDS, WE(you me eugene) CAN GO DRINK UNTIL FACE TURN FROM RED TO GREEN. HAHAHAHA. XDDD

ALTHOUGH I NEVER SEEM TO HAVE ENOUGH TIME WITH YOU IN SINGAPORE, I REALLY DID MISSED YOU WHEN YOU WERE IN INDO! NEXT TIME COME BACK, YOU CANNOT PANGSEH ME ALREADY OKAY! I LOVE YOU & HAPPY BIRTHDAY ONCE AGAIN!

YOUR SEXY, SHRIEKING, SKINNY SEVENTEEN ALREADY! One more year & you can grab the drinks in their faces already! xDDDD

LOVES & ENJOY!
(inserts picture)

2009-01-13T11:42:00.001+08:00

All I want is to get better. :DDDDDDD

The calling of the beats,

2009-01-13T11:31:00.006+08:00

make me feel so alive, in the medium.

Advert

2009-01-13T11:05:00.001+08:00

PLEASE CLICK ON ANY ADVERTISEMENT THAT IS BEING SHOWN! :DDDD

ARIGATOU!

Putting my finger on the lid

2009-01-13T10:46:00.002+08:00

As I've said(SEE I'M NEVER WRONG, ALTHOUGH I REALLY WANNA BE IN THIS CASE), December is always the month full of heartbreaks.

Anyway! School has been very much chaotic & I haven't quite settled in yet with all the DISorientation going about. Ive been very unhappy these days because of all the nonsensical retards who tend to make my life more miserable then it is already with the littlest amount of words, thank you.

Oh! Just to say, IM SICK. Well, physically sick & sick & tired of staying back in school too. :B I told my mum everything I wanted to say to her, it may be hard to believe for her, but I feel better. I know Im a big meanie to feel better but I think she already knew this many months back. That I didnt like the bastard. :D

Stupid principals are taking over schools these days. Oh well, Im leaving anyway. ^^ I hope to make the best out of everything this year.

My classmate(HA!) made me so angry, so much so I think Im making life difficult for him. SERVES YOU RIGHT! So rude lah. Zzz.

Other then that, I think life's going on smoothly though Im slipping off academically.

I really am happy & feel cherished for having friends who care about me. Kelly, Syahida, Gw, Shuan, Elton, Clement, Vanessa, Shermine, ShuTing, maybe a few more.

At least I feel grown up by having to weigh all my priorities properly.

This year will make me feel great, no less.

Freebird

2009-01-10T17:30:00.003+08:00

Orientation week is OVERRRRRR!! :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

NO MORE SKIPPING OF LESSONS & SHET LKE THAT. :PpPpPp But but but I havent completed my A & E maths! Dipshet. D: Super duper shagged & I wonder where Im getting the strength from to sit upright.

Met KeLiAn 2nights ago. It feels good neh neh neh neh neh neh neh!

Meeeting ChunBai sooooooon for Syl-chubbyface-via burfdaaay. :D

NewYear resolutions:
1.Follow the timetable
2.Not to show that Im unhappy on the face(impt impt impt!!!)
3.Sleep more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sigh sigh sigh, when the going gets tough, start not to care. :B

Bz bz bum bee.

2009-01-07T19:05:00.003+08:00

So I lied, Im online & blogging 'cos I said I would be busy this month. :B

Sigh, first few days of school got me dragging my poor feet home. I said I'll busy..& I hell yea! I freaking much am!

schoooool(2.20) -> band(6+) -> home -> homework(9+) -> sister(12+) -> sleep(6.50am)
If not,
school(2.20) -> IRP(4) -> tuition(6.30) -> home(7) -> homework(10+) -> sister(12+) -> sleep(6.50)

WHICH MAKES ME WANT TO SHOUT "I CANT HELP BUT DOZE OFF IN CLASS IF THE LESSON IS DAMN BORING!" D:<

I can't even stay in peace on Sundays because my really adorable sister idolises me so much so I have to be with her in the afternoon. I can't revise much either. It's very pressurising & taxing(physically & mentally)!

I wonder how the 2006 & 07 batch of Sec 4s did it.. >< When leadership was at it's best. Aiyoh! Stupid start-of-the-year blues! I dont like getting all nostalgic. *stupid face*

I miss my P6 days. When KaiXuan & Carmen were basketball mates. When Alan, KaChai, Jeremy, WenYuan, WeeGuan, ChunHei, WeiLiang, Sam, YuanFang, & I would call each other to ask if we were playing block catching after a few matches. When I would sneak out of the house at 5am to slack at Sam's place & play ball till night. When all I ever needed to do was play MapleStory & get screwed by my Mum when it was 1am. When all I ever wanted to wish for was to be with the person I loved. :D All the childlike satisfaction was enough for me.

Actually, all in all, my life was pretty much wasted, but I was happy! I felt happy. Really happy. :D Now, basketball is about skills on the match, no more block catching. I would never need to sneak out of the house anymore because, I can do whatever I wish! Family problems are the main cause of all my frustration. When now I can ever do is wait for a message. And I know my friends will be there for me, but they'll never understand me.

I want a friend who knows what kind of face I'll be showing when I say
something. I want that person to comfort me when I'm down & know when to
shush. To make certain sacrifaces for me, to show that Im of importance.
Because I will too. To randomly choose to go to East Coast Park on a school day
just to cycle till the butt ached! :D So we'll stay over at each other's place
when we felt like it. Well, I had this certain friend before. Guess things
change rapidly without showing.

I miss alot of things & I know I cant get them back. So, I want to live everyday like its my last, but all the responsibility & burden is thrown all over me to take. I want to live my life dangerously.

All I can say now is...

When I grow up

I wanna live my life dangerously.

Happy birthday

2009-01-05T19:38:00.004+08:00

Happy birthday dear retarded pren of mine. :B

Happy birthday Elton. (Everyday is Elton's birthday...or when Ronald says it is.)

Well, I'll be busy this whole damn month. I won't be able to come online & blog. Thank you Vanny for the daily tags. HOHO! :D Come tag me still lahhhh! :D

I've become stronger than a week ago. ^^,

Twenty old old nai!

2009-01-01T02:53:00.004+08:00

HAIRY NIU EAR PEOPLE!

(how typical XDDD)

OUT WITH MAD PEOPLE

2008-12-31T23:52:00.001+08:00

THEY MAKE ME LAUGH(OR IS IT I MAKE THEM LAUGH 0:) UNTIL IM TOO TIRED TO SLEEP. XDDDD
PLAZA SINGAPURA/

BUGIS/

(SEE THE EYELASH! HAHAHAHA!!!)

DOWNTOWN EAST/

OH YAH, WHEN WE WERE ON THE TRAIN, I USED RANDY'S HANDPHONE TO MESSAGE SHAR "Hispenisisninhermouth". When she received it, she went "WHERE?? WHERE?!!" Then Randy & I burst out laughing like we were the only few in the train. Then she shouted "HUH? HIS PENIS IN HER MOUTH WHAT! WHERE! WHERE!" WALAO, EVEN MORE FUNNY. XDDD

"His pen is in her mouth" Sigh. XDDD

OhmyGeeee, I love my CammyWammy. :DDD

Total up!

2008-12-31T23:23:00.012+08:00

Friday; 26th

Tonned at Des's place with GW, Shaun & monopolied the whole night! WAS SUPER CRAZY!

Saturday; 27th

(Happiest day of my life)

Rot at home :B

Sunday; 28th

Caught a flick with a buggerHannaaaaah! :D

Monday; 29th

Met up with Brenda cos she woke up late NOT ME AH, NOT ME! HAHAHA.

Caught Yes Man with an assBrenda & went KBox with ChuanWah, Desmond, GW, Elton, Shuan! Desmond can sound like a Fei Yu Qing who has stomach cramps.

I didnt bring CammyWammy along! ):

Tuesday; 30th

Had breakfast with Estee. I swear, everytime she laughs it makes me happy. :P

Met up with homieSyahida, Qistina & Yunzhen! :DDDD Caught up up up! ^^

ONE LOOK, AND YOU KNOW THEY'RE SISTERS. :DD

Rushed home before Bedtime Stories for Gerald's birthday BBQ. Roar, I drank a little beer(YES WE SNATCHED & STOLE HAHAHA) but I looked like I was drunk. Bloody hell. All the pictures look that way! T_T I WASNT DRUNK OKAY! Grrrrrrrrr. Had hangovers though. Eugene & Stephanie also. :B

BELOW: THE DRUNK US XDDD

(pictures not in order cos Im too lazy to do anything about it. TOO BAD HAHAHA Still have more but Im too lazy HAHAHAHA)

Waterworks.

2008-12-30T01:15:00.004+08:00

I hope all this could stop flowing down my cheeks.

What's that? Liquified disappointment & hatred.

I love Kelly & Gw so damn much for caring for me. So much so damn much! Ohgosh.

Thank you so much for the 2nd heartbreak.

2008-12-30T00:31:00.000+08:00

Those that think, see life as a joke.

Those that feel, see life as a misery.

Unconditional.

2008-12-30T00:05:00.004+08:00

Giving is the best gift to self. I didn't believe in this when I was young. I always thought receiving was the best position to be.

Some people I know give to receive. They know that as humans, the recipient will feel bad if he were to receive something, so naturally they look for something else to return. Which therefore, allows the giver, to get what he wants. It isnt bad, I mean, it isnt wrong to expect something in return, but giving unconditionally means giving something because you want to give instead of giving for the sake of knowing that you'll receive.

Giving unconditionally means giving with no strings attached, no expectations, no any sort of tag that says they need to return you with something else.

Giving because you want to, & giving because you think you HAVE to is really different. The feeling kinda sucks when you think you have to remember something instead of wanting to remember something.

Maybe, it'll be easier that for next year's Olevels you think that you WANT to study instead of HAVING to study to get better grades. It might work.

Mind over matter, mind over matter, mind over matter.

2008-12-28T00:50:00.002+08:00

I never felt like staying at home before. Now I kinda do, very much. I want to sleep. I want to rest. I want to cry. Actually, nah, not so much anymore.

Sigh, good times never last for more than 2 weeks. Haaaaaai, no point no point. Everytime I get to face friendship problems. Mum says friends dont last forever but they keep me going.

I feel quite accomplished after being able to hand out all my letters.

Gotta spur on for the future National Exam. Sigh, life's been pretty intolerant, sad & boring.

Delayed puiczsx

2008-12-26T18:37:00.007+08:00

Friday 19th;

Saturday 20th;

Tuesday 23th;

Christmas

2008-12-26T17:51:00.007+08:00

Well, after I arrived!

While we were opening presents!

After we opened presents we proceeded to taidi & gossips! :D

I are abhore December.

2008-12-25T21:33:00.002+08:00

I hate December. December = heartbreaks = broken up, immigration, losing one.

I hate heartbreaks. I hate December. Why do I keep doing this to myself?

/

2008-12-25T21:14:00.005+08:00

As the cold wind blew, she ran & ran just so the last friend on her list she could give thanks to could receive a christmas gift;a handwritten letter. Liquid dripped from her forehead all the way to her shoes, she couldn't differentiate if it were perspiration or the little drizzle that was coming her way. Whatever it was, she was determined to get there & cab down to a family party just before 12midnight. Although, she was meant to be grounded.

It was 11.45pm but he wasn't home. She couldn't wait & she really wanted him to get it after all the trouble & suffering she had put him through. So she left it outside & cabbed down to the party.

10minutes of intensity, wondering whether she would get there in time & them in anticipation, she ran & ran like 20dogs with fangs were chasing her. She got there just in time to open her presents under the tree.

After 2 hours of partying, she received a message she wished she never read. He never wanted the letter because all he could think of was it was her fault he could have gotten killed.

And now, she's only but just the biggest unwanted loser on earth who can never have a happy loving family or forever caring friends.

Wow, what a loser.

2008-12-25T21:11:00.000+08:00

Biggest loser in life : Me.

Issue

2008-12-24T15:30:00.002+08:00

I'm pissed.

I'm going on to 16 & I still can have this sort of family problems. Thanks A LOT.

Men are just plain useless but they just dont want to admit it. Rather, they make other people suffer just because tehy SEEM to be physically inclined.

Men. Hai.

No Christmas?!?!?

2008-12-24T14:53:00.003+08:00

Its been hell long since I updated! D: Pardon me. I havent been able to sit down & use to computer or had much time on my own. Its either I go out or stay home to catch up on my lost sleep. Luckily, the next few days would be rather settled.

I cant even fucking celebrate Christmas with my cousins with him around. Screw you.

I hope my GrandMa gets so upset & slaps him in the face. HAWHAWHAW.

2008-12-17T11:26:00.002+08:00

Oh screw China internet.

Peeekture meh?

2008-12-17T10:34:00.006+08:00

My images are taking hell long to load! Maybe cos its the stupid China LAN thats super slow. -.- Screw you China internet!! Anyhoo, my stepdad owns this SLR my mum bought for him last christmas. HAHAHAHAHA SO I PLAYED WITH IT THE WHOLE TIME. :B

My mum was all "No matter what, we are going home tomorrow" :D GIGIGAGAGUGU. Happy till my eyes are turning black. >< I got very pissed off with my mum just now. I hate it when people assume that I have done something wrong. I hate it when people tell me what I already know. Worse still, they say it at least 12 over times. Pfft. No wonder I cant get along with most adults. Throughout my entire 15 years living on this earth, I have never liked any adult more than my mum. Well, first she's my mum, then she's my mum & she can be really retarded. :B And she believes me. :D She doesnt go all "Really meh?" when I tell her something. I hate it when people say that when they ask me something & I answer their enquiries! "Really meh? Really meh?" Especially if its about studies & they want me to help them with it. If I werent sure, I would have said "I think...." this that this that ".......but Im not too sure, you go ask other people first." or "I have no idea, go ask someone else who looks smarter than me sorry ah" I also hate people who say "There! I told you!" I strangled my cousin(Gerald) once when I was in P4 for saying that. I cant promise you I wouldnt do the same. :[]

ANYWAY, I got pissed off with my mum because she kept asking me to wear more layers of clothes which I have already told her I did! And she kept telling me to do so! Then she chided me for assuming I had the heater up to 30degrees. She said "You crazy or what put the heater to 30degrees put it to 26degrees or something!" Then when I say I did, she doesnt apologise or anything. Who in the bloody right mind would have put 30degrees on a heater with a small kid less than a year old in it? You seriously believe your daughter is someone who will run into a desert wearing 75369753 layers of clothes? Dude! Im 15! Not 1 or 5 or 6! You put them together to make em a double digit! Ugh. Adults are such a pain in the ass. The line sucked too. No wonder Chinese people are always hollering over the phone. Sheesh. So I hung up on her. Ugh.

I got pissed off with my stepdad too. He always goes you must think blah blah blah. What the hell? I know they both care, but I HATE!! I ABSOLUTELY RESENT & ABHORE & WHATEVER OTHER SYNONYMS WITH HATE PEOPLE WHO NAG AT ME! EVEN MY OWN MUM DOESNT DO THAT. Hahahahaha, jealous right. :B When I get back to Singapore, I swear I wouldnt stay at home for more than the time I use to sleep. :D So life's gonna be good. ;DDD

Btw, the reason why this post is so long, is because I thought my pictures would load, so ranting might help waste my life. Guess China internet hates me & I cant put them up. GAAAAAAAAAAAG.

Extended extension?!?!?!?!

2008-12-17T08:52:00.004+08:00

Great. Just fucking great. My brother's wheezing. Nbcb. Fuck la. Why must come China in the fucking first place.

I dont like Chinese people shouting at me. I HATE PEOPLE TELLING ME I HAVE TO THINK, I HAVE TO BE SMART WHEN THEY DONT FUCKING KNOW ME AT FUCKING ALL.

CHEEBAI LA.

Sister's been better!

2008-12-16T13:51:00.003+08:00

Great! My sister seems to be fine. Or, better much. :D If all goes well, I should be on a plane by Thursday. If, we manage to get tickets & if the stupid doctors allow my siser to get discharged. Bleh bleh bleh.

Miss Ida, Kel, Kwa, Stef, Boyf looooooads. D:

I feel like a mom looking after dear Zachary. Wahaha! Great achievement: Patted him to sleep! Maybe cos he is still little. I also patted Nicholina to sleep! So should be great! :D I should go look for a job now, Anyone needs a babysitter? Charges at $705728653706597 per hour wor! :DDDD

Roar, I hope time can fly faster. Sheeeeeeesh.

Guess what

2008-12-15T14:47:00.005+08:00

I am supposed to be on a plane now. Happily flying back to Singapore to meet everoyne else for steamboat.

Yes, supposed. My sister is down with lung infection & is stuck in China. Just what I need. The trip is extended, so dont blame me for not attending band. I would choose to go to band anytime then stay here, in China without eating my laksa, mee soto, hokkien mee, carrot cake, speak to my so-called relatives which machiam strangers in chinese for another daaaaaaaaay!

DDDD:

I also want to go Kbox, steamboat, stayover, play bball or wii & even study! Sheesh. Speaking about that, Im left with maths & chemistry for homework. ): Try to finish within these days lo.

Trip's been pretty boring. I had a tendency to sleep at night & dream about Kelly playing with a machine gun for House Of The Dead4. HAHAHA. & Reynard with his "Must be honest!" Omg, very long ago already right. Dont know leh, weird.

I had a go at snow skiing last Saturday though! :D Quite interesting. Its easier than ice-skating! Then again, ice-skating more fun. :B Maybe cos of the friendsssssss-factor again.

I've been thining of what to do to past time. I want it to go faster! Sometimes, I really wish I could go to sleep at night then, wake up in my comfortable with Mr Snake surrounding me. Oh emm geeeeeee.

I want to go home! No matter if people actually really miss me or not! D:<>

Roarhoho, gotta go! D:

虚伪虚伪虚伪

Latest news update

2008-12-14T15:51:00.001+08:00

I will be here(in China) till the 15th of December. :/

Walao. STEAMBOAT, KBOX WITH MY DEARS WHEN IM BACK!

BBOY! MTVMIX! POP! WHACK! Your on. ;DDDDDDDD

Auto Message

2008-12-13T15:25:00.000+08:00

Do you hear me, talking to you
Across the water....
Across the deep, blue, ocean?
I miss you, do you still care about me? I hope though.

I! think! I! will! be! coming! home! soon!

Boy I hear you, in my dreams
I hear you whisper across the sea
Keep you with me in my heart,
you make it easier when life gets hard.

Auto Message

2008-12-12T15:25:00.002+08:00

12/12! Sheesh! If I were in Sg, I would bring a bunch crazy asses out to take neoprints cos it's 12/12! :D

I hope Shaun's ankle is better & he doesnt coop up at home everyday just because there's Dota on the comp! I wish GW hasnt beaten up anyone yet. :P

Btw, remember to drink lots of water after your chocolate time!

Auto Message

2008-12-11T15:25:00.002+08:00

The Singtel customer that you have reached, is not available. Please try again later.

Are you bored of hearing this over & over? :D IM NOT IN SINGAPOREEEEEE & Im not coming home any sooner! Yet I guess. :B

I hope Daryl doesnt get insomnia & I cant be there to chat up with him. I wish Brenda doesnt feel bored during the holidays & I cant bring her out! (:

Auto Message

2008-12-10T15:25:00.003+08:00

Geeez, its been another day without Vanessa-The-Great in Singapore! Hahaha! :D

I hope it's not been too taxing on Ida homie with the household chores & babysitting so far! I also wish Kelly the botch wont have too much that's on her mind(especially the mehmehs)! (:

Btw, Happy 8months Anniversary GW&Cheryl! :D

Auto Message

2008-12-09T15:25:00.002+08:00

Fee Fai Foh Fum,
You're really one dumb dumb. ^^,

It'll be winter there where the nights are long & days are short. Late night phone calls with my dearests were always short. Why cant there be winter in Singapore? :P

I will be missing you people here in Singapore. ):

Btw, Happy ~~3rd~~ 13th birthday Renee.

Auto message

2008-12-08T16:00:00.003+08:00

Ok la, no emo post. :B Show you my lovely crap peekture so as not to miss me so much. Heeee.

I wish wish wish no one gets insomnia & starts calling me. Hope hope hope & cross my heart that YuanFang will not need me during this week. ^^,

Its the 8th of December

2008-12-08T15:08:00.004+08:00

Its been a year. Reading past posts from the previous blog showed me that I was a better person before. Confidence, honesty, care, joy & everything to be proud of. I wonder what happened that made me so dependent on you. Is it me or is it everyone else has fluctuating attitude & behaviour? Thinking back of the past makes me feel like a failure. I had everything, friends, boyfriend, positive attitude. I lost both my only bestest friends & boy.

A year has past & I now understand why you meant so much to me. It's because when you left my life, you brought them with you too. 3 most important people besides my family left, just like how you did. Which concludes, everything was my fault.

Given a chance, if today were the day a year ago, I would never in the right mind have given you the chance to slip through my grasp. I knew I love you & I knew you were in pain but I didnt know you loved me in that second(now that I know). I thought letting you go, would make you feel better without me always bugging you, always making you angry. Really.

Its not that I wanted everyone to pity me I just said what was real & happening in my mind. Maybe if I had told you what I was going to type instead of blogging, it would have let you understand that there was no sense of security.

A year has past & a year has past. Nothing can ever change the fact I lost 3 person's trust. As much as I try, they wouldn't really bother trying to be there for me anymore & I really dont know why. If some people were not meant to be together then they were not meant to be together. All I can say is that, practise what you preach & you will be a better person.

Cherish those who don't cherish you, cherish those you cherish you even more.
Dont flirt.
& for me?
Dont regret 'cos in life you cannot regret.

I love you & will still stay this way for at least the next 6 months even if I try to forget.

Do I have to live with this?

NoobPig.

My forever giraffe.

Im still in ChangChun, coming back in 4++ days.

1

2008-12-07T15:00:00.000+08:00

Auto Pilot

2008-12-07T13:35:00.003+08:00

Its the first day since I have left Singapore. All these automated posts will be here to keep everyone(lizards or spocks) entertained. :P

Sigh, I just hope you wont message me in the morning because you cant sleep when I cant reply & help. I hope Bran doesnt get insomnia & cant sleep too.

Byebye

2008-12-06T19:47:00.002+08:00

Hee, byebye le. ^^,

I will read all my beloved envelopes given by my dear sisters (Kel, Rey, Kok, Jay).
I will NOT go & die as told by Gay.
I shall try to buy presents, hur Bran.

Ok, goodabye. (:

The most I will come back missing is you. :B

(so cheesy, but still LOOKING FORWARD)

Love,

Vanessa

2

2008-12-06T15:00:00.002+08:00

Gained 2hours & relief

2008-12-05T23:32:00.001+08:00

Cant help but wait to be back.

Palpating heartbeat.

3

2008-12-05T15:00:00.000+08:00

4

2008-12-04T13:45:00.000+08:00

piczsx

2008-12-04T02:29:00.002+08:00

Sg Airlines

2008-12-04T00:35:00.003+08:00

Shiat, Im flying in 2 days & 23 hours time & Im not really willing. Anyway, today I had a really good test on my camera. :B Shiok shiok curry pork. Blew 40 bucks on my new RED school bag-to-be. Gaaaaaaaaaaawd, I never felt so broke in my life! DDDDDDD:

Wo going to Dong Kok zai Satur tian for lima+dua days!!!! Aku taboleh tahan qu so long!

Without Kel, Ida, Gay, Gw, Daryl, Yf, Bren, Shaun LIFE WOULD BE SO BORING!!!!!! DAMMIT!!!!!!!!!!!!! If it wasnt boring enoughhhhh already.....

Lucky, GW the bffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff is going to lend me his PSP so I wouldnt die a bored woman there. HAHAHAHAHA. ONE HELL OF A SACRIFACE DUDE. I LOVE YOUUUUUU!

Still missing you by Xinfinity much.

"I'm hoping you'll forgive me"

5

2008-12-03T15:00:00.001+08:00

I want you to comprehend,

2008-12-02T21:56:00.003+08:00

After you absorb the substance from books, after you understand the rigour & logic of life, after you say okay I will do this. What do you do?

That I wouldnt know, but I know what you will not do. You will not practise what you preach, you will put it aside & say "maybe today's not the day", you will start screaming & shouting at other people doing those actions but never explain them or you'll just pull them aside chide them tongue in cheek. In the end there's no point to it.

So do you know what you should do? Just smile & inject a little more humour in everyone's life to make yourself & everyone around you happy.

Its not true happiness when only you feel happy, but it is when others do too. Lighten up & have a leap of faith. That's the stamina that brings you through the whole journey of life. ^^ Courage to face the truth & reality. Optimism annoys people so much so to do something to create something.

Understand the whole chunk of this & you'll grow 20cm wiser! :B

6

2008-12-02T15:00:00.000+08:00

Dry on songs

2008-12-02T14:38:00.003+08:00

I need to download songs FAST! Best if I can get Daryl Kwa to send me the type of songs I want. Im flying soon & lucky my computer didnt let me down & revitalised RIGHT NOW! :D

Songs from The Academy Is..., P!ATD, FOB, Katy Perry, Yellowcard, FM Static, Faber Drive, +41, 3 Days Grace, Plain White T's, Taking Back Sunday would be more than welcomed. :B

I need to revamp my playlist. HA. HA. HA. Im bringing my T700 on a plane in 4 days. :D

After my skin flakes, it looks like potato skin. Geez!

Life is tanned, unfair

and will stay that way so why

dont you do something ELSE about it,

retard?

Superhuman

2008-12-01T22:12:00.004+08:00

Great, my computer is still dowwwwwwwwwn. And Im leaving Singapore in 5 days to a country that's in a negative degree. D:

Skin's burnt & in pain! Save me! Someone? Anyone? *crickets calling* Looks like there aint any superhuman for me.

Ice-skating(falling over the place), Sentosa(burnt skin) all I done before. I will die without regrets. :D

tags

2008-12-01T21:55:00.002+08:00

chloeee I also dont know yours! Hahaha!
ghost Okay...but my name is still the best! ;D Letter good what. Sincere, not like you. Use blanco & blanco your father's company's name & still say it represents angpao somemore! Alamak, terok.
SYAHIDA. You at camp now?!? I thought you told me it would be on the 25-27! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
JINWEN. HEY! WHAT GAY! Okay la, quite happy. =D Missed me yet? :P
brandy Hey hey! What's your link!? HAHAHA!
` sharfana Helllllllllllllllllllll -O. :B

9

2008-11-29T13:18:00.000+08:00

2008-11-28T23:36:00.002+08:00

Hey aliens of the planet out there who still read this kinda rotting blog. sheesh, guess what. My computer is totally whacked. :D i wont be updating for the next few days (or weeks) so please dont miss me. XP I'm getting my camera ( not dslr though) soon!

this is very nice GW posting in place of her! =) ; thanks btw

tags

2008-11-28T22:24:00.003+08:00

Mastura yea la :D to urs haha! XD im gonna nail you till you die!
renee yea tts a potrait of you! :D
CHUANWAH he jus passed away twenty mins ago.. sigh~ ): you nv attend his funeral, idiot.
Annabel yea i miss you too dear scallop. when seoul garden?! :D
carine hi ambulance beeboh beeboh! XD
LIPING ogay linked! :D
kellyann gonna nail you soon. ur rubix cube is in ur pocket :D
ghost you dun chou mei la where gt like ur name. XD you will find ur xmas present in ur letter box once again. HOHOHO! XD
SYAHIDA. okay la you win alrdy lor XD thx for ur leftover ice cream! XD loves!
chloeee sry la coz tt time you private ur blog. linked! XD sry la boss
stefff when you come singapore then i tell you hehe XD okay lor everydae tok you tink wad saliva free one ah? in singapore one litre three dollar leh! hehe miss you lots too RAWR :P
yuzhi okay la nt bad la XD eh teach me the two card the same one up one down tt one leh! XD

14

2008-11-24T15:00:00.000+08:00

tags

2008-11-23T23:59:00.000+08:00

Joeeey EH WHAT LAME. HAHAHAHA! Your polka dotted lightsaver!
Estee{: YOUR UP Z50! :DDDD
Andrew Maybe you have fat fingers? O:! Do you? Do you? Do you?!
Kellyann♥ Its okay but Im sorry I made you upset! I wont do it anymore as much as I can! Im preparing 30minutes earlier now! :D
stefff. Loves you lotsssssssssssssssss! Cant wait for you to come y'know! Im thinking about what to do what to do what do when you arrive! XDDDDDDD
JINWEN. Wah *starts tearing* my daughter so cute give me a hug! :DDDDD Linked!!
LIPING HELLO PINGLI! :DDDDD
Annabel(scallop) Wah, scallop hug me so warm. XDDDDDD

Friday-Sunday

2008-11-23T22:59:00.005+08:00

Friday!

A little madness day with my all-time favourite BOTCHY BOTCH. :D I spent my Friday at home eating KFC & watching Get Smart with this little madass at home while trying to recover from my sprained ankle! :D Thank you for spending the day with meeeeeeeeeeeee!(goreng)

Saturday!
My dearest YuanFang & I went to Ang Mo Kio to play a little ball! While, I didnt really play): Wasnt up to standard. That sucks you know?! Saw her beloved boyfie she loves so dearly(Aldric), Adeline, CherBeng, Cheng Hock(?) & SHIRLENE! :D Had some basketball fun & jokes here & there. It was quite interesting to actually meet new friends & see how they are like. ^^

Went home with Shirlene. She's really a girl I never knew much about when we were in primary school but we could talk so much, so much that day on the bus ride home! ^^

Sunday!

Bugis Junction for lunch & dinner & in between homework! Caught Beverly Hills ChiHuaHua too! Wow, the movie puts the "WOW" in Chee-"WOW"-Wa, well, if they say so! Then so be it! :D Teh movie was ridiculously cute to the extent Brenda was tempted to buy a dog. HAHAHA! Talked from the moment we met till dusk. Filled up what happened in each others life while we were being pang-sehed and stuff. Although I know she couldnt get some things I was trying to mention but well it was alright! :D I had fun. The last time I had so much fun with her was during our class BBQ. (: So today was great. :D Especially when I told herrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.....

I guess when you know things will be alright, you dont feel so mad or moody so
much anymore.

Thanks Syahida for always being there for me.
Thanks Kelly for always cheering me up with her total madness & who waits for me without uttering a single complaint though I know I shouldnt be ):
Thanks Gary for letting me fall asleep over the phone sometimes(sighhhhhhh)
Thanks JinWen, Stef & Annabel for giving me a virtual hug. :D
Thanks Brenda for telling me things will be alright.
Thanks ZhangSheng who always encourages me when Im very very down.

I cannot think about who else at the moment though....
I also would like to thank all the readers for reading this blog. :D

15

2008-11-23T15:00:00.000+08:00

2008-11-22T03:23:00.004+08:00

I need a hug real bad.

Why did all of my dears sleep so early tonight. Why did I sleep so late? Why do I feel like how I did last year? You dont matter to me. Then why? You dont care, I dont care. All was fine! ALL WEREEEEEEEEE FINEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Until well, 30minutes ago.

I miss ALL of this.
DO YOU KNOW HOW FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL?????????????????????????????????

Thoughts

2008-11-22T02:12:00.004+08:00

Never felt this way before. What on earth is holding back?

Ah, why
so serious ._. Only when there are threats do I face these kind of issues. How
unnecessary. Pfft. Childish. How on earth did I downgrade myself.
Sfbzh you.

I miss GW.

I want all the reasons to why is this here.

tags

2008-11-21T00:28:00.003+08:00

Vanny(: Thanks! HAHAH YOU DAMN CUTE XD
kellyann Omg, expensiveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
Andrew Walao, DISCRIMINATION AH! DDDDDDDDDDD:
Jiggly.....
Zhenxin o.O How on earth can that happen. HAHAHAH!
Sylvia I WANT SOME DIGICAM THAT CAN TAKE CLEAR PICTURES AT
LEAST!
yuzhi I wasnt at home leh. XDDDDD
Sharmaine WHOS THERE!
Mastura I have no ideaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. I just came
baaaaaaaaaack. DDDDDDDDD;
Meixuan YES AND YOU NEVER CALLLLL MEEEEEEEEEEEE.
Annabel You look like scallop. :D

SC camp. ^^

2008-11-20T21:42:00.010+08:00

(first day: BS, second day: sleeping in bunk whole day with Delis, PeiSi, Evelyn & went home)

/ps, these are all the photos I have

THIRD DAY! :D!

(babyfreeeeze! hannah & I), (Anna-LJS-bellllll{SCAAAAALLOP} & me in Joey's specs!)

GUESS WHAT! I SPRAINED MY BLOODY ANKLE BECAUSE OF DOG & BONE. Dang!

(went wildly hungry)

DINNER: SAKURA BUFFET

(In the boring bus with Brenda :D)

Anusha was there!

PICTURES;

(With Jumping Joey. XDDD)

(Evil Evangeline no lah. Just for letters sake only. She's opposite of evil. SO CUTE :D)

(Very-sexy-voice Vinod ;p)

(MY DAUGHTER! I forgot how I became Mdm Phang. LOLOL!)

(Breasty Brenda -.- HAHAH)

(Serious joker cum coconut SinEe ;D)

(Thinking Tricia hahaahhaha!)

(Yeah usssssssss)

(Retard Renee ;P)

Back to school---

AFTER CAMP WENT TO EAT AT PS WITH BRENDA & SIN EE ;D GOSSIP GOSSIP GOSSIP.

Overall, camp was fine. I loved the nights with Z50 & ABC100. + gossip gossip gossip. ;D

ESTEE CANNOT CROSS HER EYES. XDDDDDDDDD

Have to wear red tie because PL & Prefects collaborated. What to do. Try not to ask me too many questions.

20

2008-11-18T15:00:00.001+08:00

Quick! I want a camera! ):

22

2008-11-16T13:24:00.002+08:00

Before I start to put in ALL my effort & strength to

give

up.

SL camp zooooooooom.

2008-11-16T12:27:00.002+08:00

Okay so Im leaving for SL camp tomorrow, still I will be updating day by day though. :D

Sigh, havent been helping much around the house yet I have to leave for camp. Shitto. At least got PSP to play with. Heeeeeeeee.. Family will be out at the Botanic Gardens(for the 4th time) & I'll be home trying to study & start packing my bag. :P Stupid Shermine will only join us on the 3rd day. Idiottttt!

I should go, toodles! :D

DDCation + wishlist. ;D

2008-11-15T13:52:00.005+08:00

Homie! Thanks for being there all the time. Im really really really sorry that I cant get to your messages all the time. Sheesh, whats wrong with me. D:<
So Christmas is coming, YAY! Let me help you people out there to get me what I want! :D

-./POLAROID!
-./SUPER SLEEK DIGICAM! (give me give me give me by 5th
Dec leh! XD)
-./A SMALL BOX FOR RECYCLABLES!
-./♥&Z*&
-./DAY OUT WITH MANY PEOPLE & LAUGHTER(ice-skating,
kbox, cycling, LAN, eating, ANYTHING AT ALL! Just call me if there's fun please! >:B)
-./LAST BUT NOT LEAST, ONE TRUCKLOAD OF LOVE! :DDDD

For the record, I never really wanted anything specific for any of my birthdays or christmases! So this is my first time HAHAHAHAHA.
GW, Shuan, Clement, Hei leaving Sg soooooon! ):

Tuesday-Saturday

2008-11-15T11:48:00.004+08:00

Havent blogged for 5 days! DDDD; I think I lost the touch. Summary!

Tuesday!
WENT TO REPAIR VIDEO CAM WITH
Vanessa!

<-I dragged this luggage + giraffe around Toy's R Us! :D

Wednesday!
BAAAAAAAND

This is Father Raymond. Asshole. XD
He's the only entertaining reason why I go to band. ;D Thanks for taking my phone & making myself wreck my brain everytime to look for it!
& dinner-ed.

Thursday!
Met Kelly up for breakfast with Hei. :D Before I forget, let me tell you a story. :D
This girl super cute, she opened this yogurt packet

& piack, kena yoghurt on her face.
You know who? :B
KellyAnnTeo. :DDDDD

ATE AT SEOUL GARDEN WITH
GuanWee, Shaun, Damian, Willy, ZhiEn, Vanessa, WeiKai, Clement, Desmond!
Ate for like a few dang hours! HAHAHA! They made strawberry chicken & some yam & chocochip chicken. Wabiang, damn retarded XD

Kena suan by ZhiEn in the face so I decided not talk to him for the meantime(asshole). Walked around and saw Brenda & Joycelyn. OI OI OI BRENDA CUT HER HAIR SHORT LEH! Look like her sec1 face. :D Laughed like complete morons with them, they damn cute la! :B

<-THIS IS CHERYL'S BOYF. :DDDD
Went to play LAN at Evo(B), WABIANG! CAN DIE EH, KENA BULLY LIKE CAAAAAT FOR 1ST ROUND. Stupid Desmond! I slipped all my shortcut keys so I died pretty much a million times(what a feederD:) but Willy, GW & Shuan still ruled the game. >:D

Used a hero that I used before for the 2nd round :D Seemed better cos I remembered what to pump. Ah Siew teach me how to use leh! Dont pray pray. In the end, Vanessa, WeiKai, Anson, Ramdan came over. So WeiKai played for me & beat Desmond's ass. HAHAHAHAH! :D

The opposite row was making hell loads of noise so the rest just zisiao. XD Like "later when we engage, we shout f guanwee upside down!" then Willy went like "HUAT AH!" Aiya, it was stupid la. XD Laughed like hell!

Shivered & cried..was it right to walk away?
Had tons alot of fun. I forgot how much fun it was to go out in a big, crazy group HEEEE. :D I also forgot how much fun guys spelled. Loved loved loved that day! :D It was mad lah! :pPpPp Thank you all so much! :DDDD

Friday!

Band, lunch & met Kelly up to service Nikon cam(Anson Rd) & collect VidCam(Harbourfront). THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ACCOMPANYING ME KELLY ALTHOUGH I MADE US ALIGHT AT THE WRONG STOP! Sorry & thank you! :DDDD Its tough, but you know you'll over it.
<-So many things to do!

Later in the day!
Physics tuition! I wonder if Vincent is going. Hmmmmm... Go slack with Shaun & GW I hope! ): THEY ARE GOING CHEENA SOOOOOOOON! D;

Rmbrng Sndy

2008-11-10T22:27:00.001+08:00

Leuven damn cute.
Girl faint -lend a shoulder.
Girl cry -lend a helping hand.

HEH. Cheeky boy. :P

Smell

2008-11-10T21:56:00.004+08:00

EH! :D JOYCE HAIR SMELL VERY NICE! :D Smell like ------------ :P

Actually I dont really know what to blog about but I miss alot of things now. ;D but I guessssssss its okay because life is like that what. HOR?

I dont know Joyce talk so much rubbish eh. o.o! Scandaloussssssssssss.

---
shini ARIGATO! :D NO EMO BAYBO! Loves! *hits ass* SCORE! o.o? XD
yuzhi YA LAH! But not really illegal right? :D
zhuzhu(: WHAT WHAT WHAT, -----.------
siewping YAH I KNOW! :D
---

I want to show the world that perseverance can move a person.

Trust me, I know I will.

Maybe just wishful thinking la, but! :D

Eh, Joyce use clear leh. Walao, smell nice leh! Jealous. :P

Dn Angel

2008-11-09T15:37:00.004+08:00

Listened to River Flows In You & reminded myself of Caged Bird in DN Angel so I went to listen to it again. Shitto, wrong movo, felt so strong in emotion I felt like puking(dont know why either) TT promised she will play it for me. LWC into-ed this anime about......2 years ago when we were on very good terms. I fantasized for AC to be Niwa Daisuke.

Seems like the strong ties I tried pulling out are connected again, in a mess.

The pain back again.

Look forward instead!

2008-11-09T13:11:00.007+08:00

Yesterday was my first day of tuition at Linda's House thingy. It was............educational. :p Sat with WanLin, primary school friend I havent seen for more than 3years. She's..........smart. d: Almost fell asleep a couple of times but everytime I close my eyes I remember my lousy level position so I didnt. HEEEE. Messaged messaged messaged everytime the teacher left the room then WanLin was like "Wah cher go already all immediately take out handphone." There were only 3 of us so, fine.
Note: I think I really got problem communicating with humans, made myself paiseh of times. Shit shit shit, bad first impression. ROAR!

Wanted to meet Kelly but Amah got wedding(not hers lah obvious) so had to transform into nanny. ): Thing is, I decided to go back to BoonKeng when I was in Little India & was moving towards Dhoby Ghaut. Walao, ps bodohzzzzzzz. Worse still, I forgot to get off the train when I reached. WABIANG EHZZZZZZ. Must travel baaaaaaaack. Cow cow cowz.

Watched BUSTAMOVE marathon at home. The host is like super duper uber oooper retarded! Mum asked me to bring bro for a walk on a bike thingy outside. Sister came out with Auntie(maid) to play hide & seek. And guess what........

She peed on the floor when I BOO-ED her.

Yes this girl.

Peed on the floor outside someone else's house. OMFGOMFGOMFG right! HAHAHAH!

Met this pig out to talk last night. :D Stayed out till 2 talking about a lot things. It meant a lot. ^^, I feeeeeeel greaaaaaaaaaat now! :D Thanks Edward & Syahida too! Sorry I gotta fly longer than I thought it shudda lasted! Man, & I thought there was a class outing to look out for. D:

P.S., uncle is back.

I miss you.

29days before we've been dead for a year.

Do you even know I love you

& will do anything for.

Dreaming of your best hugs when I just cried in your arms

& you telling me its alrightt as long as we are together.

I told myself that it was just a dream

but still I tried to hold out a little longer.

I really thought it was real.

Even the scent of your hair was real.

I dont want to say antyhing

just hug me.

You are the only one who's tying me back to the past. Ily.

DD-cation

2008-11-07T23:28:00.001+08:00

Shoutout: "HOMIE! LOVES YOU LOTS!" xP